• 1/3 cup croutons (of your favorite stripe)
• 1/2 LB butter/margarine
• lots of garlic
• 2 oz. parmesan cheese, thickly grated
• 5 anchovies
• 1/2 teaspoon Dijon mustard (or, ground mustard seed)
• 1 egg
• 1/2 LB stray gato (thoroughly washed and rinsed)
• 1 fresh, bright green jalapeno pepper
• Salt and freshly ground black & red peppercorns to taste
• 1/3 cup virgin olive oil
• 1 medium head (3/4 LB) romaine lettuce

• Wash lettuce thoroughly, and set aside
• Mix butter, garlic, cheese, anchovies, mustard, jalapeno, oil, butter, and egg in blender for about 10 seconds
• Layer lettuce leaves in large bowl (do not fold, spindle, or mutilate) andspread mixed stuff over them
• Take freshly washed gato. Dry it, comb it, feed it some fresh salmon. Then, place on soft pillow on floor by table.
• Salad, having sat for 10 minutes, should be placed on individual plates.
• With knife and fork, scarf down salad and pet El Gato as needed
• when done with salad, wash and dry plates.
• Remove cat from pillow and pet thoroughly
• Then, pet each other.

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